I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize