It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
This toilet bowl is my home.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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