So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize