also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
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