Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
