Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize
