Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
