Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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