For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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