did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
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