Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
