I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Randomize
