But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
Randomize
