Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
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