I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
