How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
Randomize
