We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
