I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
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