They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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