I just made out with a guy for $7.
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
