Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Randomize
