Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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