so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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