What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
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