and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Randomize
