i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Randomize
