Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize