I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
