Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Randomize
