so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
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