I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Randomize