I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
