you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Randomize
