It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
