She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
being pregnant is like rehab
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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