so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
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