My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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