I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
