Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize