i would punch a child for taco bell
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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