ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
