2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize