Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
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