i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
