Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize