My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I could fuck to npr.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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