I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
i think my cat just said my name.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize
