I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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