That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Randomize