Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
Randomize
